Permalink
Cannot retrieve contributors at this time
| ▄██▄ ▄██▄ ▄█▄ ▄████████▄ ▄██▄ ▄██▄ ▄███████▄ ▄▄ ▄██▄ ▄██▄ ▄██▄ | |
| ████ ████ █████ ███▀ ▀███ ████ ████ ████▀ ▀████ ████ ████ ████ ████ | |
| ████ ████ █████ ███▄ ▄███ ████ ████ ▀█████▄▄ ████▄▄████ ████ ████ | |
| ▀███▄ ▄███▀ █████ █████████▀ ████ ████ ▀▀█████▄ ▀█████████ ████ ████ | |
| ▀███████▀ █████ ████ ▀████▄ ███████████ ████▄ ▄████ ████ ███████████ | |
| ▀███▀ ▀█▀ ▀██▀ ▀██▀ ▀███████▀ ▀███████▀ ▀██▀ ▀███████▀ | |
| Ю=-=--==-=--==--==-=-=--=-==-=-=--=-=-=-=-==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=Ю | |
| Ю В И Р У С З А В А С независимо файлово издание брой 14 31.12.1996 Ю | |
| Ю=-=--==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--==-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=ю | |
| Днес в броя... | |
| ТъТъеМ? - историята на един нещастен руут и някакъв си хакер. | |
| Пълноценното използване на unix системите - пълен самоучител. | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ Лаф на деня! ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| DO ONTO OTHERS BEFORE THEY UNDO YOU !!! | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ И още.... ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| A vision without a task is but a dream | |
| A task without a vision is drudgery | |
| A vision with a task is the hope of the world. | |
| - Carved on a church, 1730 | |
| Surrey, England | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ AIX4 - новата OS на IBM ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| ПЛАТЕНА ПУБЛИКАЦИЯ - ПЛАТЕНА ПУБЛИКАЦИЯ - ПЛАТЕНА ПУБЛИКАЦИЯ - ПЛАТЕНА ПУБЛИКА | |
| Новата операционна система на IBM е идеална за разрастващата се дейност на | |
| все по-нашумелите у нас ИСП-та. Тя ви гарантра сигурност, лесна поддръжка, | |
| добра защита на системните ресурси и повишена производителност. Тя повишава | |
| самочувствието на вашите потребители (АКА "абонати"). Поръчайте сега! | |
| За закупилите системата IBM предлага специална оферта на система AS/400 или | |
| RS/6000, като ви дава целия софтуер под наем, запазвайки правото си да го | |
| подмени или прибере обратно, което ви гарантира увереност в дълготрайната | |
| безпроблемна работа на вашата система! | |
| За контакти: selas@mtt.gb | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ Статия на броя ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ Едно съвсем случайно приключение ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ от Юзер Ю-звер-ски ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| (Текст, upload-нат в new директорията на един столичен FidoNet BBS | |
| през guest account-а. Автор-неизвестен.) | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=- Начало на статията | |
| Седя си аз и си набирам 91919 за Inex такси, както всеки новоизлюпен | |
| хакер използвам модем за целта! Само дето моята клавиатура е малко | |
| разбърникана и съм принуден да използвам numpad-овете. Явно след | |
| дълга работа, пръстчето ми е трепнало леко надолу и съм объркал | |
| една от единиците. След малко (за моя почуда) чета на екрана | |
| следното: | |
| CONNECT 28000/ARQ/V34 | |
| ... и нищо. Като всеки тъп потребител праснах два-три-четири- | |
| пет бързи enter-а и кво? "Username>"! Тук у мен се събуди хакерското | |
| и се отказах да се прибирам да спя. От осмия път познах един account с | |
| име==парола и се linkup-нах :-) След като ми писна да си browse-вам | |
| напред-назад и да мънкам пи-пи-пи, реших да разгледам що за машина | |
| е тази... | |
| Меню. Малко меню. Пуска разни неща със system("<censored>") и... | |
| Елементарно! В системата има talk. А аз имам един стар приятел, казва | |
| се /bin/sh. Та talk-вам си аз с &/bin/sh и той от радост ми вика $... | |
| Абе аз не съм лош човек, иначе можех и да позабърша диск-два, ама | |
| нейсе. Поразгелдах системата, ама нищо интересно - само gif-ове от | |
| playboy.com. Дори и в home директориите на потребителите -- пак | |
| красавици... :) Сякаш си нямаме достатъчно в magdanoz... | |
| Тогава се сетих че ми трябва един нов twsk25g.exe и си пуснах find... | |
| След малко забелязвам -- root-а си седи пред машината и не му прави | |
| ни най-малко впечатление, че cd-то самоволно си върти. Както и да е, | |
| източих я. | |
| Еxit-нах. За радост router-а имаше help, при това context sensitive! | |
| Разгледах повечето му команди (за заинтересуваните са интересни se p, | |
| lo p 3, sh u, con address и доста други, абе вижте си ги сами). | |
| Писна ми. Какво толкова може един router. Е, не можах да го | |
| преконфигурирам на CTS/RTS handshake, за да мога да си пусна zmodem, | |
| ама какво от това... Пратих си нещата на myaddress@freenet.fi. :-) | |
| Под неща разбирайте passwd, shadow и някои други, които само като се | |
| изрекат на глас и идват няколко стари unix призрака от 01-01-1970... | |
| Разбира се, повечето потребители си ползваха Windows 95 и следващото | |
| забавление беше да сменя една две опции в системата, да си инсталирам | |
| 95 и да click-на на Network Neighbourhood... Умно е да си share-неш | |
| целия диск и да кажеш full access на Everyone :-( E, да ти преименуват | |
| winsock.dll на winsock.ldd може да се възприеме и като дребна | |
| приятелска шега в някои среди. Намерих и един ценен екземпляр с добре | |
| инсталиран Winдoze NT и разни екстра tools-ове! Реших, че е печен и му | |
| Shut-down-нах компютъра, с време за реагиране 120 секунди. Тъпо е да | |
| имаш DHCP и да не погледнеш в Properties, нали? ;-) | |
| Писна ми и това дребно удоволствие и реших да почета малко поща. Поща | |
| ли? Каква поща? Нали току що бях влязъл и то не като аз? Ами много е | |
| просто - чуждата, разбира се! Това обаче е удоволствие, само когато | |
| хората са на ниво... След като прочетох около 20 съобщения за това | |
| как е мама и много поздрави на хиляди неизвестни хора, няколко | |
| договора за внос/износ на какви_ли_не_дивотии, реших да събера всичката | |
| поща (~/mail/inbox/*) и да си grep-вам за нещо по-интересно. До | |
| половината вървеше flawlessly, ама се намри някакъв гад, който беше | |
| влизал преди мен в sh и си беше направил правата за ~/ както правят | |
| белите хора... Отказах се и от това, но поне до неговата директория | |
| прегледах почти всичко - нищо интересно. :( | |
| Реших и аз да се правя на сериозен хакер и да си позачистя следите... | |
| Е, не е кой-знае колко трудно да се сетиш да напишеш rm .sh_* като | |
| първа команда, защото в новите unix системи се срещат и разни екстри | |
| като recycle bin например... | |
| Писна ли ви да четете кой-какво-къде бил правил? Искате да знаете как? | |
| Ами не е трудно... Речник: ei, bdata, bti, smartcom, tradel, | |
| /etc/passwd... | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=- Край на статията | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ Виц на броя ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| These two strings walk into a bar and sit down. The bartender says, "So | |
| what'll it be?" | |
| The first string says, "I think I'll have a beer quag fulk boorg jdk^CjfdLk | |
| jk3s d#f67howe%^U r89nvy~~owmc63^Dz x.xvcu" | |
| "Please excuse my friend." the second string says, "He isn't null-terminated." | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ КОЛОНКА НА РЕДАКТОРИТЕ ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ Strange kidS or stupid kidS ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ от Winnie the PooH ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| === Cut === | |
| WP: Hi Stoian, this is your sysop | |
| WP: hello | |
| SS: Hello | |
| WP: you will never download the file using these bad protocols X and Y modem.. | |
| WP: try Zmodem | |
| SS: My program does not support zmodem | |
| WP: then the bad thing is your program. find another one and then try again! | |
| SS: iskam da te pitam v DOS ili v Windows e po dobre da se svarzvam | |
| WP: zawisi.. za DOS ima mnogo po-dobri terminalni programi. za Windows puk ima | |
| WP: drugi neshta.. zawisi.. | |
| SS: Kazaha mi che v windows e po bavno | |
| WP: towa ne e problem, zashtoto mozhe da se smeni comm.drv i da se oprawi. | |
| SS: Prochete li v maila te pitam nesto | |
| WP: ne. oshte ne sum si chel poshtata.. | |
| SS: Pitam te dali moze v Internet da se pazaruva s chuzdi credit card | |
| WP: mozhe, no e po-weroiatno da te hwanat. | |
| WP: I kakwo sa si kupili do sega? | |
| SS: Mnogo ot moite priateli go prawiat no s drebni sumi i CD,flanelki i dr. | |
| WP: Towa ne e garancia, che wyobshte sa izpolzwali creditni carti | |
| SS: Te imat niakakwi nomera i kazvat che kato iskash da kupish prosto popalvash | |
| SS: nomera | |
| WP: ne stawa.ima drugi neshta, koito se proweriawat po-kusno.. naprimer - adres, | |
| WP: ssn (social security number) i t.n. predi 5 godini beshe po-wyzmozhno-sega | |
| WP: ne. | |
| WP: Po zakonite na USA i na drugite ewropejski durzhawi, izpolzwanet na kreditni | |
| WP: karti na chuzhdi sobstwenici e uglawno prestuplenie s osobeno golemi razmeri. | |
| WP: Nakazanieto e goliamo, globata sushto. Mogat da wi razkataiat. Nishto, che | |
| WP: sme | |
| WP: w Bulgaria. I wyobshte - po-dobre ne se prawete na smeli hackercheta. | |
| SS: Toest ti mi kazvash che oste stava no ne mi go preporachvash Niakoi okolo | |
| SS: tebe | |
| SS: hvastali li sa go | |
| WP: s fanelki CompuServe i AOL se motaiat po ulitzite i se gordeiat, che sa | |
| WP: otkradnali! kak wyobshte si mislite za towa ? shto ne wlozhite | |
| WP: polozhitelnata | |
| WP: si energia i poznania za komputrite w neshto, koeto shte wi nosi mnogo puti | |
| WP: poweche pari!? | |
| SS: 1-Ti li si avtora na VFU-to | |
| SS: 2-Koe spored tebe nosi mnogo pari v Bulgaria | |
| SS: 3-Triabva da sabiram 1 week pari za da si kupia markova flanelka s mizernite | |
| SS: si LEVOVI spestiavania | |
| WP: 1-az biah awtor, t.e. sy-awtor na VFU-tata. | |
| WP: 2-towa e neshto, koeto sam triabwa da otkriesh. to taka na gotowo - ne | |
| WP: stawa. | |
| WP: 3-syzhaliawam. da si se rodil na drugo miasto. no yawno ne si, taka, che ne | |
| WP: wizhdam prichina towa da te kara da kradesh. | |
| WP: 4-az se sumniawam, che wyobshte niakoi ot was osuznawa polozhenieto si i | |
| WP: wsyshtnost kakwo prawi. smiatate, che e mnogo hitro da izpolzwate na niakoi | |
| WP: chowek parite, dori bez da go poznawate. bez da znaete, na tozi imenno | |
| WP: chowek edna takawa krazhba kak shte mu se otrazi? imate li danni za towa, | |
| WP: dali toi plashta smetkata i znaesh li kakwo e da niamash drug izbor | |
| WP: oswen da ya platish? | |
| SS: V USA horata opredeleno ne sa za milost i tova ne e tochno krazba i zasto | |
| SS: pishesh v VFU-to samo loshi nesta za nas kato nie samo se opitvame da | |
| SS: ziveem dobre????????? | |
| WP: Na kolko si godini? | |
| SS: Na malko | |
| WP: Kolko? | |
| SS: malko | |
| WP: 13? | |
| SS: poveche | |
| WP: 14? | |
| SS: poveche kakvo te interesuva | |
| WP: Mi zashto si kriesh wyzrastta? | |
| SS: a ti zasto me pitash | |
| WP: Interesno mi e. | |
| SS: a ti na kolko si | |
| WP: Smiatash li, che e chestno taka da postupwash? Sys sigurnost sum po-goliam | |
| WP: ot teb, zadadoh ti wypros, ti pochna da mi se prawish... Kazhi sega na | |
| WP: kolko si godini i az shte ti kazha. | |
| SS: na 19 | |
| WP: Ne ti wiarwam. | |
| SS: zasto | |
| WP: Kakwo uchish? | |
| SS: Ucha v Mladost uchilishteto za computeri | |
| WP: Deto e kum MEI? | |
| SS: Yes pravo v celta | |
| WP: Ok. W moita firma raboti edno momche deto minalata godina go zawurshi. | |
| WP: Dokato | |
| WP: beshe oshte w uchilishte mi razprawiashe za nego.. Kakto i da e.. Toi sega | |
| WP: e w | |
| WP: MEI, a nawurshi 19 predi 3 mesetza. Taka, che mnogo losho me izluga. | |
| SS: E, moze malko da sum izlagal | |
| WP: da. naprimer s kolko godini? | |
| SS: 2 | |
| WP: 17. nali? a mozhe bi oshte ne si gi nawurshil. | |
| SS: sega ste vzimam knizka(driver-ska) taka che 17+ | |
| WP: za kakwo goworia. ili razgowariaj s majka ti na taia tema. | |
| SS: Ia mi kachi price listata za internet | |
| WP: imam go samo na hartia tuk.. obadi se i wlez kato guest. | |
| WP: ama tam mozhesh da ya widish samo na ekrana ili s zmodem. | |
| SS: Imam zmodem no tova e drug vapros , znaesh li vchera se zamislih kakva e | |
| SS: dalaverata(pechalbata) ot BBS mozesh li da mi obiasnish ako ne te ,marzi | |
| WP: ne me marzi, ama wseki Sysop si ima sobstweno mnenie. Az go prawia za kef | |
| WP: weche. ot 6 godini imam BBSi. Ne samo edin. I dosega finansowa dalawera ne | |
| WP: sum | |
| WP: widial.. Oswen trupaneto na tui narechenite Nematerialni Aktiwi. No towa e | |
| WP: neshto, koeto shte mi e trudno da ti obiasnia s pisane. | |
| SS: No vse pak tova te vkarva v razhodi pone tiah pokrivash li | |
| WP: pokriwam gi, no ne s prihodi ot BBSite. a s druga rabota. | |
| SS: A kakvo oznachava XaX | |
| WP: Nishto. :) | |
| SS: CPS rate triabva da dava sredno | |
| WP: 2400 e mnogo bawno. Ama mnogo bawno. Wsushtnost za drugi neshta oswen za | |
| WP: chetene na poshta i chat ne stawa weche. Edno wreme az sushto sum bil na | |
| WP: 2400, | |
| WP: no e otwratitelno. A i sega cenite sa mnogo niski. Edin 14400 modem s voice | |
| WP: struwa pod 60 dolara. Kakto i da e. XaX i wsichki ostanali moi systemi sa na | |
| WP: 33600. | |
| SS: Viarno 14400 struva pod 60 no bokluk a ne markov | |
| WP: Ne e zadulzhitelno da si kupuwash markov modem. Ima mnogo dobri zhulti | |
| WP: modemi. | |
| WP: Towa e wyzmozhno da stawa i ot drugi prichini. Primerno, che twoiat priatel | |
| WP: ne | |
| WP: znae kak da si go nastroi. Ima mnogo neshta ot koito zawisi skorostta. I w | |
| WP: powecheto sluchai ne e ot modema. | |
| SS: miDobre da ama moia dava sredno 330 istiga do 550 tova za mene e | |
| SS: zadovolitelno | |
| SS: i e dobre za 2400 , spored mene v BG niama nuzda ot po dobar | |
| WP: ne priemam twoeto mnenie za wiarno i ne smiatam, che shte go zadurzhish | |
| WP: dulgo | |
| WP: wreme. 330-550 CPS mozhesh da poluchish SAMO na textowi - nekompresirani | |
| WP: failowe, i to ako modemut ti poddurzha data compression. W protiwen sluchai | |
| WP: maximumut, koito mozhesh da postignesh e 250-270 CPS! | |
| WP: Na krastawiachar... nali znaesh prikazkata? | |
| SS: Ne e viarno naTvoia kolko CPS ti dava | |
| WP: moia :)) moia dawa 3500. | |
| SS: Dobre de niakoi hora kazvat che kolkoto ida e dobar modema v BG ne moze da | |
| SS: se | |
| SS: izkara mnogo | |
| WP: ami twoiat problem e, che im wiarwash! | |
| SS: Kolko e max. BPS koito si izkarval | |
| WP: fizicheskata skorot na modema mi e 33600. | |
| SS: IZKARAL SI 33600 | |
| WP: estestweno! Abe pich, kato ne wiarwash - ela da widish! kwo mi gubish | |
| WP: wremeto | |
| WP: da mi razkazwah niakoi debil kakwo ti bil kazal!!!!!!! | |
| SS: Kazi mi koi ot zaltite sa dobri | |
| WP: powecheto ot tiah sa bezimenni. | |
| SS: A SmartLink | |
| WP: stawa. | |
| SS: Ama ne | |
| WP: Problemut, ne e w modema wi, a w negowia setup. | |
| SS: DEMEK | |
| WP: Demek, chetete knizhki. | |
| SS: Da TOVA GO ZNAM | |
| WP: Ok. Za drugoto - drugia put. | |
| SS: krai | |
| WP: chao | |
| SS: ok SHE SE VIDIM | |
| WP: ok.. chao | |
| === Cut === | |
| ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=--==-=-=-=-=-=-= ▄═─═─═─═─═▄═▄═ | |
| ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ UNIX Самоучител (Продължава от VFU.013) ░▀░▄ V.F.U. ▀░▄░ | |
| ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-= ═▀═▀═─═─═─═▀═▀═ | |
| pooh:~# rm -r * ~ | |
| ~: no such file or directory | |
| *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*- | |
| ~#@! ATTENTION! Proceedin' furthermore can degrade your motional skills (*&^ | |
| $^*%&^ and make you misbehave properly in society! #@$^&* | |
| *-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*-*- | |
| baby(1) USER COMMANDS baby(1) | |
| NAME | |
| baby - create new process from two parents | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| baby -sex m | f [ -name name ] | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| baby is initiated when one parent process polls another | |
| server process through a socket connection in the BSD ver- | |
| sion or through pipes in the System V implementation. baby | |
| runs at low priority for approximately forty weeks and then | |
| terminates with a heavy system load. Most systems require | |
| constant monitoring when baby reaches its final stages of | |
| execution. | |
| Older implentations of baby did not require both initiating | |
| processes to be present at the time of completion. In those | |
| versions the initiating process which was not present was | |
| awakened and notified of the results upon completion. It | |
| has since been determined that the presence of both parent | |
| processes result in a generally lower system load at comple- | |
| tion, and thus current versions of baby expect both parent | |
| processes to be active during the final stages. | |
| Successful completion of baby results in the creation and | |
| naming of a new process. Parent processes then broadcast | |
| messages to all other processes, local and remote, informing | |
| them of their new status. | |
| OPTIONS | |
| -sex define the gender of the created process | |
| -name | |
| assign the name name to the new process | |
| EXAMPLES | |
| baby -sex f -name Jacqueline | |
| completed successfully on July 9, 1992 at 9:11pm. | |
| Jacqueline's vital statistics: 8 pounds 3 oz, 20 | |
| inches long dark hair. The parent process, Kim | |
| Dunbar, is reportedly doing fine. | |
| SEE ALSO | |
| cigar(6), dump(5), cry(3). | |
| BUGS | |
| Despite its complexity, baby only knows one signal, SIGCHLD, | |
| (or SIGCLD in the System V implementation), which it uses to | |
| contact the parent processes. One or both parent processes | |
| must then inspect the baby process to determine the cause of | |
| the signal. | |
| The sleep command may not work as expected on either parent | |
| process for some time afterward, as each new instance of | |
| baby sends intermittent signals to the parent processes | |
| which must be handled by the parents immediately. | |
| A baby process will frequently dump core, requiring either | |
| or both parent processes to clean up after it. | |
| Despite the reams of available documentation on invoking and | |
| maintaining baby, most parent processes are overwhelmed. | |
| AUTHORS | |
| From a man page by Joe Beck, . | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| LSD(1) UNIX Programmer's Manual LSD(1) | |
| NAME | |
| lsd - turn off your mind, relax, and float downstream | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| lsd [ -dsS ] brandname user ... | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| Disturbs the given users according to dosage, set, and setting. | |
| If more than one user is specified, each will be affected by the | |
| others, according to the arguments they give to lsd on their | |
| own terminals or machines. It is recommended that one of the users | |
| in a group specify a dose of 0, and that at least one other user be | |
| experienced in using lsd. | |
| Brandname is usually a blotter pattern, but may be used to specify | |
| a non-blotter form, such as "windowpane" or "pyramid." | |
| There are a number of options, each of which can have a strange and | |
| not completely predictable effect on the users: | |
| -d Dosage. A dosage of 1 to 3 is recommended for first time | |
| users, although strength varies with brandname and storage | |
| conditions. | |
| -s Set. Recommended values are "calm," "happy," and "groovy." | |
| Sets like "angry," "frustrated," and "bummed" may cause file | |
| system damage, and should be avoided. For these sets, other | |
| utilities are available (see "valium"). | |
| -S Setting. Recommended are "familiar," "interesting," and | |
| "comfortable." Hostile and challenging settings are reserved | |
| for experienced users. | |
| FILES | |
| /etc/trips is a log of system-wide use of lsd since booting. | |
| BUGS | |
| When invoked with incorrect arguments, lsd will print out a random, | |
| Unixy-sounding error message and remove this man page. | |
| User state should return to normal in twelve hours or less after | |
| invoking lsd. With extreme parameters, however, this cannot always | |
| be guaranteed. | |
| The output device is assumed to be 80 columns wide. | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| SLeePos(zzz) SleepIX Programmer's Manual dream(1l) | |
| NAME | |
| dream - suspend execution for an interval while executing | |
| random code in memory | |
| SYNTAX | |
| dream [-d][[-nrRsw] [time]] | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| Dream suspends execution of the current proces for time | |
| seconds, while simulating a dream sequence by executing random | |
| segments of code in memory. All devices are paralyzed (blocked) | |
| to prevent dangerous side-effects. The options are as follows: | |
| -d daydream. code seems to be more related to the actual | |
| suspended process, and suspension will be for a limited | |
| amount of time. Attention can be restored by snapping | |
| fingers next to keyboard. | |
| -n nightmare. Repeated references to the system error logs | |
| are made during execution. | |
| -r recurring. The code of a previous execution will be | |
| re-selected for this dream. | |
| -R REM (Rapid Eye Movement). The current value of the PC is | |
| is flashed on the screen for every instruction. | |
| -s sleepwalking. Tape drives will be sent many alternating | |
| fast-forward and rewind requests and/or line printers sent | |
| many alternating carraige-return and tab codes to promote | |
| movement of machine(s) across floor. Stopping these | |
| devices may confuse the program. | |
| -w wet dream. The code is selected from the sex(1l) program. | |
| Dream will invoke automatically with the -d option when the | |
| system proves extremely slow. | |
| The relation of the randomly-executed code to the subconcious | |
| (background tasks) of the current processes is suspected but has | |
| not been proven. | |
| WARNING | |
| do not select the -w option without covering the keyboard. | |
| SEE ALSO | |
| sleep(1), sex(1l), dream(3l), alarm(3C) | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| PLACE(1) Parody Systems PLACE(1) | |
| NAME | |
| place - print and set the system location | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| place [ [-v] [-]ddmmss[-]dddmmss ] [ +format ] | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| If no argument is given, or if the argument begins with | |
| ``+'', the current location (latitude and longitude) are | |
| printed. Otherwise, the current location is set by | |
| teleporting the system. The first dd is the degrees of | |
| latitude (negative for south); mm is the minutes of | |
| latitude; ss is the seconds of latitude. The second ddd is | |
| the degrees of longitude (negative for west); and so on. | |
| For example: | |
| place 385100-1050300 | |
| sets the location of the system to the top of Pikes Peak, | |
| Colorado. The correct altitude is automatically provided | |
| and cannot be specified. The system operates in feet. | |
| Place takes care of the conversion to and from local | |
| standard measurement units. | |
| When a new location is set, all logged-in terminals and | |
| users are transported along with all other system | |
| peripherals. | |
| If the -v (verbose) option is specified when a new location | |
| is set, place prints a running description of the locations | |
| the system passes through enroute to the given destination. | |
| Note that this can slow down transport time considerably, | |
| from instantaneous to however long it takes to print the | |
| description to standard output. This option is not | |
| recommended if stdout is a terminal connected at less than | |
| 4800 baud, since hitting BREAK can leave the system | |
| stranded. | |
| Attempting to set the place off-planet generates a warning, | |
| and requires an extra confirmation from the (super)user. | |
| If the argument begins with ``+'', the output of place is | |
| under the control of the user. The format for the output is | |
| similar to that of date(1). All output fields which use | |
| hours, minutes, or seconds are applicable (substitute | |
| "degrees" for hours, where appropriate). | |
| Place writes an accounting record on the file /usr/adm/wtmp. | |
| DIAGNOSTICS | |
| No permission If you aren't the super-user and you try to | |
| move the system. | |
| bad conversion If the place set is syntactically incorrect, | |
| or below sea level. | |
| bad format character | |
| If the field descriptor is not recognizable. | |
| FILES | |
| /dev/kmem | |
| /usr/adm/wtmp | |
| /usr/lib/altitudes | |
| AUTHOR | |
| Alan Silverstein, Hewlett-Packard | |
| SEE ALSO | |
| date(1), whereami(1), whothefuckami(1) | |
| BUGS | |
| If there is not a supply of compatible electric power at the | |
| new location, the system usually crashes before place | |
| finishes writing accounting information to /usr/adm/wtmp. | |
| This command should not be used on systems connected to a | |
| Local Area Network, for obvious reasons. | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| NCM(1) (Essential Fluids) NCM(1) | |
| NAME | |
| ncm - new coffee maker | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| ncm [ -RadCxmlnogrtucpFbqisf ] [caf|decaf|columbian] | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| For each available heating unit, ncm determines if coffee | |
| exists, is hot, and is not tar(4). If any of these are | |
| true, the necessary actions are taken to change the | |
| situation as required, or as specified by the environment | |
| variable BURNERS. ncp then gathers the necessary material | |
| and proceeds. The -M option makes coffee in the morning. | |
| The drinkinfo(4) database is used to determine the blend and | |
| the amount of caffeine, based on the environment variables | |
| DRINK, TZ, and the current time. If this information cannot | |
| be obtained, full strength Maxwell House is assumed. | |
| The ncm command has many, many more than the following | |
| options, not all of which are currently supported. Some may | |
| never be supported. We are really busy here, and we will | |
| try to get around to it as soon as possible, but Doc is | |
| breathing down my neck to get something else done, so you | |
| will just have to be patient!: | |
| -R Recursively make coffee until all resources are | |
| exhausted. | |
| -a Generate aroma only. | |
| -l The same as -n except slower. | |
| -d Brew decaf. Will not operate before 10:30 am. | |
| -n The same as -l | |
| -j Use Jamaica Blue Mountain primo special. This can only | |
| be executed by coffeadmin. | |
| -r Reverse the order of brewing to get newest first or | |
| oldest first as appropriate. | |
| -v Execute the vgrind(1) program before proceeding for a | |
| fresher brew. | |
| EXAMPLES | |
| ncp -ldm NOW! | |
| Make lots of coffee now! | |
| FILES | |
| /etc/grinder | |
| /etc/filter | |
| SEE ALSO | |
| tee(1), coke(1), sync(1). | |
| NOTES | |
| The ncm command may be used as a filter. | |
| For more information see the "Making Good Coffee" section of | |
| Chapter 10 of the Kitchen Administrator's Guide. | |
| BUGS | |
| Ick. I hope not. | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| SEX(1) EUNUCHs Programmer's Manual SEX(1) | |
| NAME | |
| sex - have sex | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| sex [ options ] ... [ username ] ... | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| sex allows the invoker to have sex with the user(s) speci- | |
| fied in the command line. If no users are specified, they | |
| are taken from the LOVERS environment variable. Options to | |
| make things more interesting are as follows: | |
| -1 masturbate | |
| -a external stimulus (aphrodisiac) option | |
| -b buggery | |
| -B | |
| bestiality with | |
| -c chocolate sauce option | |
| -C chaining option (cuffs included) (see also -m -s -W) | |
| -d | |
| get a date with the features described in | |
| -e exhibitionism (image sent to all machines on the net) | |
| -f foreplay option | |
| -i coitus interruptus (messy!) | |
| -j jacuzzi option (California sites only) | |
| -l leather option | |
| -m masochism (see -s) | |
| -M triple parallel (Menage a Trois) option | |
| -n necrophilia (if target process is not dead, program | |
| kills it) | |
| -o oral option | |
| -O parallel access (orgy) | |
| -p debug option (proposition only) | |
| -P pedophilia (must specify a child process) | |
| -q quickie (wham, bam, thank you, ma'am) | |
| -s sadism (target must set -m) | |
| -S sundae option | |
| -v voyeurism (surveys the entire net) | |
| -w whipped cream option | |
| -W whips (see also -s, -C, and -m) | |
| ENVIRONMENT | |
| LOVERS | |
| is a list of default partners which will be used if | |
| none are specified in the command line. If any are | |
| specified, the values in LOVERS is ignored. | |
| FILES | |
| /usr/lib/sex/animals animals for bestiality | |
| /usr/lib/sex/blackbook possible dates | |
| /usr/lib/sex/sundaes sundae recipes | |
| /usr/lib/sex/s&m sado-masochistic equipment | |
| BUGS | |
| ^C (quit process) may leave the user very unsatisfied. | |
| ^Z (stop process) is usually quite messy. | |
| MAN AUTHOUR | |
| Sean Philip Engelson (spe@cad) at Carnegie-Mellon University | |
| HISTORY | |
| Oldest program ever. | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| RR(1) USER COMMANDS RR(1) | |
| NAME | |
| rr - Russian roulette | |
| SYNOPSIS | |
| rr | |
| DESCRIPTION | |
| rr executes a random command from one of the directories in | |
| the user's PATH environment variable. The command is | |
| invoked with arguments | |
| -fr $HOME | |
| DIAGNOSTICS | |
| `. not found' - Consult an expert. | |
| FILES | |
| None (if you hit the jackpot). | |
| SEE ALSO | |
| kill(1), kill(2) | |
| BUGS | |
| Some commands do not understand the game: they keep whining | |
| about `unknown options.' | |
| Please send bug reports to Hacker Cracker | |
| (Postmaster@vfu.hcb.bg). | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| Sequent: | |
| % strings unix | grep sorry | |
| sorry, pid %d was killed due to unsupported system call | |
| sorry, pid %d was killed due to %s | |
| % | |
| DecStation: | |
| % strings vmunix | grep sorry | |
| sorry, pid %d was killed: %s | |
| sorry, pid %d was killed on swap error | |
| % | |
| Sun/Soulbourne: | |
| % strings vmunix | grep sorry | |
| sorry, pid %d was killed due to swap problems in %s | |
| % | |
| =-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=- | |
| * % !1997 | |
| 1997: Event not found. # (on some systems) | |
| * % How's my lovemaking? | |
| Unmatched '. | |
| * % ^How did the sex change^ operation go? | |
| Modifier failed. | |
| * % ^How did the sex change operation go? | |
| Bad substitute. | |
| * % sh | |
| $ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense | |
| no sense in pretending! | |
| * $ mkdir matter; cat >matter | |
| matter: cannot create | |
| * % cd /tmp | |
| % touch this; chmod 000 this | |
| % ln -s /usr/bin/touch U | |
| % U this | |
| U: cannot touch this: no write permission | |
| * % rm meese-ethics | |
| rm: meese-ethics nonexistent | |
| * % make love | |
| Make: Not war! | |
| * % ^What is saccharine? | |
| Bad substitute. | |
| * % alias alias alias | |
| alias: Too dangerous to alias that. | |
| * % write desert | |
| desert is not logged on. | |
| * % man you | |
| No manual entry for you. | |
| * % !bluemoon | |
| bluemoon: Event not found. | |
| * % scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"^J^D | |
| "Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found | |
| * % cat 'the can of tuna' | |
| cat: cannot open the can of tuna | |
| * % rm Quayle-brains | |
| rm: Quayle-brains nonexistent | |
| * % look into "my eyes" | |
| look: cannot open my eyes | |
| * %touch me | |
| %chmod 000 me | |
| %touch me | |
| touch: cannot touch me: permission denied | |
| * % ar x "my love life" | |
| ar: my love life does not exist | |
| * % ar x "matey the treasure" | |
| ar: matey, the tresure does not exist | |
| * % talk Gorvachev@Kremlin | |
| talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address. | |
| * % talk Comrade Khruchev | |
| [Your party is not logged on] | |
| * % echo '[q]sa[ln0=aln256%Pln256/snlbx]sb3135071790101768542287578439snlbxq'|dc | |
| GET A LIFE! | |
| * % ping elvis.rice.edu | awk '{print substr($1,1,5), $2, $3}' | |
| elvis is alive | |
| * % finger huge-keg-party@big-house | |
| Unknown host | |
| * % make ' ' bang ' ' with gun | |
| make: Fatal error: Don't know how to make target ` ' | |
| . >>>---------> | |
| : . | |
| \\\. | |
| >>>---(Oo)---> | |
| /C \ Вирус за вас. Независимо файлово издание. | |
| /___/\ | |
| \ U / Редакцията временно е на хавайските острови. | |
| Hic! >__< C|c| | |
| / \/ \//|_| Край на брой 14. | |
| //| |\/ >>>---------> | |